ClayandJulieCochran: Billy Cochran

On January 28, 2015, Billy joined our family.

The weeks and days leading up to his birthday were long, and if I was being honest, were wrought with anxiety, excitement, fear, happiness, and everything in between. My doctor wanted to induce me (and, frankly, I had no idea why Billy had not been born yet!), so we picked Wednesday, January 28. We chose this date so he could share a birthday with my grandmother, Mimi.

Labor could not have gone more smoothly, or easily. I figured being induced would make everything go slowly, but within 6 hours of starting the pitocin drip, we were holding our sweetest new baby boy. I knew it was going to be a flood of emotion for me, but I just had no idea what emotions I would feel. Would holding Billy make me ache for Nan more? Would I be overwhelmed by past memories in a delivery room? Would the Lord's best for our family be enough for me?

The overwhelming feeling I experienced as I heard Billy's first cries was redemption.

There is no replacing a child who is not with your family. But there is redemption. And I have prayed that I would see redemption on this side of Heaven. Where there was deafening silence after Nan's birth, our room was filled with sweet baby cries (and lots of adult tears of joy, too). Where there was sadness and loss, there has been great joy restored to our hearts. The Lord has redeemed our broken hearts, and made them whole, as only He can do.

But possibly my favorite moment of that day (and there were too many to count!) was when George laid eyes on his baby brother for the first time. My mom brought him up to the hospital just before nap, and Clay was holding Billy. George's mouth fell open, and he walked straight up to Clay with his arms up in the air. George got up on the bed with me, and as I was holding Billy, he looked at me, and said, "Do we get to keep him?"

I really forgot to take pictures like we did when George was born. And part of me is sad that I don't have pictures with Billy and all of his visitors, but I really just wanted to soak up the day.

Brothers' first meeting

These boys make my heart so happy.

I had to include our sweet nurse, Jada. She was just the best!

My mom took care of George while we were in the hospital, and we came home to flowers, a gift for Billy, and the sweetest sign for our newest family member. I actually can't take it down, because I love it so much.

George pretty much wants to be *right* where Billy is. If he could just lay right on top of him, I think George would be pretty happy. Clay and I have started referring to him as 'Lenny' from Of Mice and Men because he just wants to squeeze his baby brother.